Plastisaurus

Sticker for Rusty Old Bike: "This is not rust. It’s a high-tech theft-preventive coating."

2011-08-22T11:17:00.000-07:00

To give your rusty old bike some panache, or at least show others you have a sense of humor about it, print this statement and tape it to your bike: http://bit.ly/nRLM27.

This is not rust. It’s a high-tech theft-preventive coating.

The Kaizen Culture: Don't Manage Waste, Eliminate It

2010-05-24T09:19:00.000-07:00

Kaizen is the Japanese term for constantly working to eliminating waste in all ways, at all levels. It's quite popular in manufacturing and other pursuits, and is helping to increase the competitiveness of our industries.

But in our everyday lives-- now, that's a different, sadder story. Today is large trash day here in Swarthmore. On just a few nearby streets, I saw enough nice, usable furniture out on the curb to furnish an apartment.

Our current approach, at its best, is called cradle-to-grave management. But that's a misnomer, since there is no actual "grave" where so much waste can be buried. As in our industries, we must seek to eliminate waste, by not producing it in the first place. This is called cradle-to-cradle resource management, or zero-output waste management.

The way we're "managing" our waste now, we're destined to drown in it, sooner or later.

Corn Plastic: Beware the Wolf in Sheep's Clothing!

2010-05-10T19:21:00.000-07:00

Corn plastic is bad. While it may look "less bad" than petro-plastic, it's making things worse, for these reasons:
1. While it does biodegrade, it doesn't do so as easily as similar containers from paper or sugar cane.
2. It appears to be messing with the existing petro-plastic recycling culture, a system already struggling with vast and intractable consumer ignorance.
3. Making a corn-based "substitute" uses MORE PETROLEUM than the petro-based one it's supposed to replace.
4. It directly supports Cargill Corporation, which you don't want to do for too many reasons to list here (visit Grist.org, search Cargill, and pick your issue. Whatever it is, they'll be on the wrong side of it.)

Here's detail I copied from a posting by Dr. Dan Wolk on the subject:
Here's some useful information on the cups we're using at Mishkan, from
grist.org (where I go for answers to the most perplexing environmental
questions!):

"Corn and other bio-based plastics are particularly tricky because to the
casual observer, it looks like regular petroleum based plastics. There is
evidence that recycling as little as 1 part of PLA in 10,000 of PET
(Petroleum based polyethylene terepthalate) will degrade the quality of PET
and render it unusable as a recycled polymer. This is a huge problem for
recyclers and the source of great debate among bottlers and recyclers as
some companies have started bottling their beverages in PLA bottles. PLA
bottles are NOT recyclable with PET (though they could be fed back into the
PLA stream... Cargill does not have a collection system to recycle PLA so
this point is moot) but they look just like it to the casual observer. Thus,
unknowing recyclers can contaminate the PET bottle recycling stream
by placing PLA bottles with their regular recyclables. NAPCOR (National
Association of PET Container Resources) recently publicly refuted claims of
recyclability of PLA.

http://news.morningstar.com/newsnet/ViewNews.aspx?article=/BW/20090724005033_univ.xml I
am no fan of petroleum based plastics either, but to tout bio-based plastics
as being "green" is disingenuous and very confusing to people who are trying
to employ environmentally preferable practices. If you want a compostable
cup use paper!"

After reading all about it, including a response from Cargill's
sustainability director, the only advantage of the "corn" cups is that
they're not made directly from petroleum (though growing corn uses LOTS of
it!). They're not recyclable, and compostable only in a commercial
operation. Plus, their purchase supports a rather environmentally
unfriendly corporation.

The best alternative? Bring your own cup. If you're prone to leaving
those behind, as I am, the next best alternative: cups made from sugar cane
fiber (bagasse) - an agricultural waste product. Cost: 8 cents each - the
same as the "corn" cups.
In honor of Shavuot, I humbly recommend switching to the Bagasse cups when it's time to reorder..

Dan Wolk

For Sale: Stumbling Blocks, in solids and fine veneers

2009-03-09T07:23:00.000-07:00

FOR SALE: Fine, furniture-grade Stumbling Blocks, in solid woods and hardwood veneers.
Lovely accessories, add grace to your home decor as pedestals, plant stands, and as tasteful arrangements, combined with other pieces. Also useful as side tables, and with optional cushion, as foot stools or seats for small children.
Wonderfully inert, useful for stabilizing large piles of objects, as well as for stopping trucks, traffic, meeting agendas, and relationships. Quite heavy, on-site pickup only. Make offer.

A green collar job is not just a retooled blue collar job

2009-03-09T06:46:00.000-07:00

Why is a a green collar job is not just a retooled blue collar job?

The old Division of Labor ignores the intricate web of life, and is what got us into our current environmental mess in the first place. The Green Collar Movement can't afford to perpetuate the destructive old division of thinking that is integral to the division of labor concept.

I have plenty more to say about this, which I'll add when I get a chance.

For definitions, refer to: http://ecopreneurist.com/2008/03/29/green-collar-jobs-defined/

Sweat is good

2009-01-22T07:14:00.000-08:00

SWEAT IS GOOD.
It keeps you cool,
and doesn't leave a
nasty carbon footprint.

From my cold, dead hands: Unwiring the first wired president

2009-01-20T17:17:00.000-08:00

Note: this is a work of fiction. Would I take the time to vet all the details in this story? Be serious, it's not like anybody's paying for this stuff.

Barak Obama is the first wired president. Truly the model Type A leader, ever since his first term in the Illinois Senate, Obama has rarely been without his Blackberry. Michelle emailed legal insights, mixed in with updates on their daughters. His staffers would provide up-to-the-second news and floor vote margins, so he sometimes knew what the opposition was going to do, before his opponents themselves knew. Then he'd relax by texting sports, jokes, and opinions with friends. And so it's been, throughout a successful and meteoric rise.

But all that is about to end.

One morning soon, in the presidential bedroom:

Oh, what a first week! Is it Saturday already? I must have slept through the alarm. Hey, where’s my Blackberry? I plugged it in right here by the bed last night, and now it’s gone.

Barak sweetie, Rahm came by before you awoke, and took it. The Secret Service couldn’t secure the signal, and they got worried.

But I can’t be without my Blackberry. I am the Wired President, after all. What will people think? I need to call Rahm... now, where’s my Blackberry? Oh, right.

Where’s the dang phone? Okay, it’s a land line. I can do this… Where’s the dang speed dial? I don't know Rahm's number- will somebody call him?

Oh, he’s still downstairs? Okay, what button do I push for that?

Hi, Rahm? Great thanks, how’re you? Hey, Rahm, sorry I missed you when you stopped by this morning. Rahm, listen— I want my Blackberry back.

Mr. President, I’m afraid that won’t be possible…

Rahm Emmanuael, remember who you’re talking to. I am the President of the United States, and you are my Chief of Staff, and I want my Blackberry. Got that?

Barak, listen: You have people for that stuff now. You don’t have to…

Are you telling me what I don’t have to do? Jeez, why don’t ya just put blinders on me and stuff my ears with spitballs? Having a Blackberry is like having eyes in the back of my head. I can't just give that up, once I've gotten used to it. I feel so... so vulnerable.

Sir, we— your staff and I— are here to take care of that for you.

Oh, yeah. And next you’ll tell me Michael Jordan was more important to the Bulls when he wasn’t playing…

The president manages to survive the rest of the day, but not without a few withdrawal incidents and a lot of separation anxiety.

Late that night, an emotionally drained Obama falls into an exhausted but restless sleep. A few hours before dawn, he awakes screaming.
"No! No! From my cold, dead hands! From my cold, dead hands! From my…"

"Barak!" Michelle shakes him awake. "You’re having a nightmare. Wake up!"

He jolts upright, panting, the sweat glistening on his brow and dripping down the tightly clenched muscles of his face. In response to his screams, the bedroom door lock snicks open electronically, and two pairs of crewcut sunglasses come into view, whispering into their headsets.

"What was it, sweetie?” She cradled his shivering frame in her strong arms. "What were you dreaming about?"

"I was walking through the tunnel, on my way to address the House of Representatives, and my Blackberry rang in my pocket. I reached in, and it wasn’t there. But it just went on ringing, and then the ring sounded like one of the girls crying. I started running toward the sound, and suddenly I was outside, standing in the sun. It became a ring tone again, and there was George Bush, standing in the middle of the White House basketball court. He answered the call, on my Blackberry. My Blackberry! I yelled "Hey, that's mine!" and ran after him, and he ran away, yelling, “Hah-hah! You’re the president now, and I'm not, and you can’t have your Blackberry, and I can! And I’m going to use your Blackberry and text my friends and be hip, and make the three-point shots, and you’re not! Hah-hah-hah-hah!"

I lunged and tackled him then, and he kept cackling, until he howled when I twisted his wrist and snatched my Blackberry back again. But then a couple of enormous Secret Service guys grabbed me, and started prying my fingers open, trying to take my Blackberry away. I hung onto it and yelled, 'No! No! From my cold, dead hands! From my cold, dead hands, will you have to pry my Blackberry, to take it away from me!' And that’s when you woke me."

(c) 2009 David Calloway

Before you get too gushy about Obama---

2009-01-20T17:06:00.000-08:00

Yes, Obama is now the Commander in Chief of the nation's armed forces.
And of course, he should be respected and admired by military types.
But, really-- don't you wonder if things have gotten a little too cozy,
when they've renamed the places they sleep as "Baraks"?
(c) 2009 David Calloway

Fun!Raising Fair for Black Liberation and Community Development

2008-04-27T17:30:00.000-07:00

SUNDAY, MAY 4, 2 TO 6 PM:

3rd Annual Fun!Raising Fair, to benefit Black Liberation and Community Development in the Philadelphia Region, sponsored by the Philadelphia RC Communities

(If you're looking for the PLASTISAURUS story, skip a few blog entries down.)

Germantown Friends School, 31 West Coulter Street, between Germantown Avenue and Greene Street.

Performances by Chosen Dance and other local groups, plus games + crafts + music + fun

COST: Pick your sliding scale donation: $5 to $50 at the door.

Call 215-848-6496 for tickets or info, or just show up!

Come learn-talk-share about our history-culture-ideas about ending racism.

Humans of all backgrounds, ages, and beliefs are welcome!!!

This unusual spring fair is organized and run by a dedicated and diverse group of people, of all ages, social, and racial backgrounds, to raise money for Black Liberation and Community Development Work. Our goal is to create a space for people of all kinds to have an enjoyable afternoon, to play, eat good food, try crafts and games, and see performances by a great dance company and other local artists.

The funds raised by this event will go directly towards scholarships, travel and other financial support of Black Liberation projects and workshops for people in our neighborhoods. Your attendance at this event will help us reach our goals, build relationships, and celebrate our communities.

All are welcome and invited to come learn, talk, share, play, and explore what life is like when people of all kinds have fun together!

Make a TALL HAT with onion bag and balloons

2008-04-25T18:40:00.000-07:00

(If you're looking for PLASTISAURUS, skip a few blog entries down.)

To make a TALL HAT with an onion bag and some balloons:

Find a 5 lb plastic mesh bag from onions or potatoes. Make sure it's empty first, or it may weigh too much to put on your head. You also need two or three round balloons, depending on size; and something to make an elastic headband from. I used the cut-off sleeve of a short-sleeve shirt.
"Peel" the sides of the bag down half way, and carefully inflate one of the balloons inside it. The balloon should fill the bottom half of the bag that it's in. If not, you'll need 3 balloons.
Pull the sides of the bag up, and inflate another balloon in it. Continue until the balloons fill all of the bag except for that top 3-4 inches or so.
Pull the headband over your head too far, so it's over your eyes and ears.
Pull the bag over your head, and pull the headband back up so it holds the bag in place atop your head.
Since you're now about 2 feet taller, duck to go through doorways.

A photo will be available as soon as I get one from the rally at which I recently wore this costume piece.

Make your own Easy Clowning Costume in 10 minutes!

2008-04-14T05:57:00.000-07:00

Make your own Easy Clowning Costume in 10 minutes!

Instructions (cc) 2008 by David Calloway. Reproduction permitted by
Creative Commons license for non-commercial purposes, with credit to author.

A photo will be available as soon as I get one from the rally at which I recently wore this costume piece.

The point here is not to look authentic.
The point is to look colorful, festive, and ripe for silliness!

That’s the attitude we want to project. And when YOU wear a silly costume of any kind, it helps YOU bring out your inner clown. Wear your costumes on the bus or train on your way here, and answer stares by telling people why you’re dressed so fashionably. OR, bring your accessories to our circus, and attach them there. We’ll have safety pins, paper clips, clear tape, and masking tape on hand.

Have more easy costume ideas? Send them now to Plastisaurus@comcast.net, and we’ll forward them to the list!

EASY CIRCUS ACCESSORIES: GOOFY BOW TIE AND WIDE LAPELS,

STREAMER GRASS SKIRT, and BIG, COLORFUL STOVEPIPE HAT

GOOFY BOW TIE AND WIDE LAPELS (makes two sets)

Find a colorful cardboard box; cereal boxes are great.

Slit one edge of the box, then lay it out flat, face-down.
On the back of the flat box, draw lines about like you see in the image at the right. You DON”T need to be precise!
Cut the box apart along all the lines.
With clear tape or staples, attach the narrow ends of the outside longer pieces, at a sharp angle, so they look like a pair of wide lapels.
Do the same with the inside longer pieces, to form a second set of lapels
Overlap the narrow ends of 2 of the shorter triangles, and tilt them so they look like a bowtie. Fasten them like that.
Hold the bowtie and lapels up to your front, get them positioned just right, and tape or staple them together.

Goofy, huh? Now you have a set for yourself, and a set to give a friend!

Even better, use 2 boxes with different colors and patterns, and swap the bowties and the lapels, so you have contrast.

STREAMER GRASS SKIRT

Buy two rolls of streamer, or one rainbow roll, if you can find it.
Cut a dozen or so lengths a few feet long, and cut a piece of string long enough to go around your waist or chest, with some extra length to tie it.
Staple the streamers to the string, to make a “grass skirt” effect.
You can tie the skirt around your waist, or if you make the streamers body-length, you can wear it at your chest, for a full, swirling mumu!

BIG, COLORFUL STOVEPIPE HAT

Find a big enough CEREAL BOX, and just put it on your head. Definitely, the highest-leverage effort-to-silliness ratio available today! If it keeps falling off, staple a string to each side, and tie it around your chin.

Polydacyls sighted over Manchuria, satellite photos confirm

2007-12-14T08:25:00.000-08:00

(New to the Plastisaurus story? To start at the beginning, read the first posting at the end of this blog.)

Passengers looking down from jet flights over northern China have often commented on the large, tangled clouds of polyethlene shopping bags that appear to be "flying" on the high winds, thousands of feet in the air. Infrared analysis of satellite photos now suggest that actual creatures may be hiding among these masses, feeding off them, and propagating whole communities of flying plastisauri.

Authorities have been unwilling to comment on this phenomenon, or to speculate how it could be happening. But one scientist, quoted off the record, has referred to these airborne creatures as "Polydactyls".

Plastisaurus Update

2007-12-03T09:02:00.000-08:00

UPDATE on the Plastisaurus story---
(To start at the beginning of the story, read the earlier posting below.)

This morning the story took a chilling turn. Yes, synthetic lifeforms such as Plastisaurus, Styrodon and Polydactyl, which seem to have evolved spontaneously from inanimate heaps of cast-off plastics, are terrifying to the average civilian. But national security experts have chosen not view them as major threats, believing them to be isolated phenomena. It now turns out this may not be the case. About a month ago, these creatures, if they can be called that, were found to be emitting weak electromagnetic signals, perhaps attempting to communicate with… what? Or, with whom?

Soon after these signals appeared, similar signals were detected emanating from a large mass of plastic drifting in the Pacific Ocean. This mass, nearly the size of a small continent and growing, is just the largest sibling in a family of similar masses growing in all our oceans. A great deal of discarded plastics seems, at some point, to migrate into an ocean, where currents and prevailing winds push them into large, floating clusters. But natural forces alone cannot account for the speed at which these masses are growing. The products of our throw-away society seem to be almost consciously migrating to one or another of these great masses.

When the unfamiliar signals were first identified, those from the creatures appeared to converge with those from the drifting mass, somewhere deep in space. Latest readings, however, show the convergence point to be aproaching Earth at an alarming speed.

No doubt about it: Something, some entity perhaps, is getting closer. Something very big, and very fast. And for some reason, it appears to be communicating with the growing aquatic “colonies” of discarded plastics, and with the creatures that have spontaneously evolved from the same source: That mysterious “Away” place that we have been mindlessly throwing our refuse into. But, as eyes-open scientists know, nothing is ever just "thrown away", because there is no "away" to throw things to anymore.

How can we save ourselves from this menace? There are many things we can do, but they all boil down to the same thing: starving these monsters, and the oceanic colonies that spawned them, of the large quantities of plastics they need to survive. The “Away” we're throwing our trash into is getting bigger every day, and now threatens to be taking on a life of its own.

Where did Plastisaurus come from?
I'm not a journalist, but I have gathered some information. Plastisaurus appears to be an Alien Menace growing in our midst, feeding and thriving on our cast-off plastics.

Plastisaurus' story begins on the far-off home planet of the Plastisauri, a rapacious, space-faring race that “seeds” ambitious, developing planets like Earth with apparently convenient plastics technology. They know that, because Plastic Is Forever, the planet will reach a critical mass of manufactured non-biomass. If the target planet's citizens don't interrupt the process by that time, the Plastisauri return and take over. They strip away the superficial convenience elements, enslave the whole planet’s populace and resources, and force them to work day and night manufacturing non-biomass to feed the Plastisauri. When the planet's resources are depleted, the Plastisauri pick up and move on, leaving the planet a depleted shell.

On the other hand, if the planet’s natives wise up and reverse the tide before critical mass is reached, the Plastisauri are helpless. Without the critical non-biomass, they cannot take control of the planet. If this happens, rather than invading the planet, they will fly right by it, leaving those on the target planet unaware that they were ever targeted for destruction.

So why, if we aren't yet at critical mass, are Plastisaurus and Polydon battling in the parking lot of my Acme today? That's uncertain. Perhaps a diplomatic screw-up led several Plastisauri tribes to lay competing claims to our planet. Or maybe the monsters were dispatched to Earth by their leaders intentionally, each tribe wanting to get the jump on the others. Either way, their battles have become a major embarrassment to their own kind. But to we humans and our planet, they're a godsend. They've tipped their hand, giving us an advance warning. Very few planets have been so fortunate, and so far, none has had the foresight to heed the warning and reverse the trend.

"Plastics," he whispered in The Graduate's ear.
A side note: Do you remember the kindly uncle who whispered "Plastics" in the ear of The Graduate? Yep— he was an alien, as shown in this digitally re-processed clip of that scene. [link to YouTube video goes here.] Notice, in this digitally deconstructed and reconstructed sequence, that the human image was just a mirage, hiding the true, horrifying visage of the plastic alien that spoke those fateful words.
Watch, now— there! Did you see that tiny, squishy, almost-transparent creature jump from the uncle's mouth into Dustin Hoffman's ear? Unfortunately for the creature, Hoffman turned out to be an unacceptably hostile environment. Without knowing it, he ejected the invader's harmless corpse in a slightly uncomfortable bowel movement the next day. But the message itself had invaded many of the millions of youth who saw that movie, in one of 33 languages. They have gone on to become major promoters, purveyors, and marketers of plastics, concentrating on the types that are most difficult to recycle.

Next: Satellite photos confirm Polydacyl sightings over Manchuria

Plastisaurus vs Styrodon

2007-11-19T07:19:00.000-08:00

What is a Plastisaurus?
It’s a way to humorously dramatize the impact of plastics in the environment, and educate the public how to identify and demand recyclable plastics and recycling, and why it’s important.

Picture a crowded supermarket parking lot on a Saturday afternoon.
A pickup truck stops in front of the store, and a worker in a sanitation-looking jumpsuit shovels two big heaps of plastic onto the pavement, jumps off after them, and the truck drives away.

The piles begin to move and growl. Suddenly they burst upward with a roar, into two giant, trash-heap monsters— slashing, shoving, and bellowing at each other. Soon, as the volume of their roaring drops, the worker-narrator begins to speak.

The amplified narrator tells a tale of the battle between recyclable and non-recyclable plastics.
The largely-ignorant public is either trashing both, or recycling both. Either choice is wrong. Except for the (intentionally) almost-imperceptible number on the bottom, you can’t tell them apart. But to the planet and its creatures, there’s a huge difference…

What’s really wrong, goes the tale, is that this store, like many others, is forcing consumers to buy non-recyclable containers in the first place. (Trader Joes, incidentally, has pressured many of its suppliers to use mostly #s 1 and 2 recyclable plastics. But they don’t proclaim that, because they have a long way to go.)

Of course, the story holds for most food outlets of any kind in this region, and perhaps across the nation, although I haven’t checked yet. So the venue and impact potential is endless.

Actually, this is a highly simplified version of a complex story. Of course #s 3-6 are recyclable, but for various reasons, both economic and technical, most recycling centers won't take them. So, municipalities won't, either.

How this came about
I had triggered a family member's anger by going through her recycling bin, pulling out the many carefully-washed #6 take-out, sushi, and produce containers, and putting them in the trash.
She was already disgusted with her Manhattan apartment building for their half-hearted support for recycling. Now here I was, stirring that into impotent consumer rage at all the stores and vendors who sell things in ostensibly “recyclable” containers, that are, in fact, not recyclable.

In my vision, a large pile of discarded plastics transforms itself into a pair of battling monsters: an evil one risen from a simmering landfill to take over the world, the other risen from a recycling center to battle it. The battleground, of course, is the shopping center parking lot, drawing attention and heat to the major retailers who are forcing consumers to buy the most non-recyclables.

Is this plastic recyclable? Bally's YES, Fantastic Foods NO

2007-11-19T07:11:00.001-08:00

Kudos to, of all places, Ballys Health Clubs for using #1 PETE plastic for their vitamins. Discouraged recently by how few things are #s 1, 2, or 3 (the only ones my municipality will take), I almost assumed it wasn't one of those. Happily wrong I was! Into the recycle bin it went.

Now, Fantastic World Foods-- Remember Fantastic Falafel and the other grainy, pasty vegan treats from the Health Food Store days? Well, the food's still as appetizing as Garrison Kealor's infamous Raw Bits, but now they're putting it in un-recyclable #5 containers, instead of the coated cardboard of old. Oh, what's the World (Foods) coming to?